What’s a homeschool mom to do when her kid starts asking to go to public school?
Should she give up and give in and send them off on that yellow school bus?
Should she stand her ground and say too bad?
Or is there an in-between that would work best for everyone involved?
I’ve been homeschooling for fifteen years, and I’ve encountered that push for change with each of my three kids. We answered each kid differently for various reasons, because the blessing of homeschooling is the freedom to do what’s best for each child. There is no one-size-fits-all answer.
When They Want to Go to Public School
Answer #1 – Yes… and no
When we first started homeschooling, my husband was not fully on board. He did, however, agree to let me give it a try on the condition that the kids would have the option to attend public school when they reached high school.
As my oldest neared high school, we agreed to let him enroll in high school his freshman year. It started out well, but it didn’t stay that way. I won’t go into detail, but it was a really bad run. He tried to stick it out, but it didn’t ever improve. We pulled him back out shortly after Christmas his senior year.
At that point, we decided that all the kids would finish out homeschooling through high school.
Answer #2 – I guess so…
When Isaac was in middle school, we didn’t know very many people that homeschooled. Therefore, there weren’t many opportunities for us to socialize with other homeschoolers. In fact, we only knew one other homeschool family. This can be a blessing or a curse depending on your personality. For Isaac, this was a negative. He is my most extroverted child. He needs other people. And, his siblings and me just weren’t enough.
But, as I mentioned above, public school was just not an option. It was not open for discussion.
However, at the end of his eighth grade year, a brand new charter school was being built just down the road from us. After much prayer and research we decided to put Isaac’s name in the lottery. I wasn’t 100% on board, but I really didn’t think he’d get in. He was one of over 200 applicants vying for 50 open Freshman slots. He did, however, get in!
I have to say that it was hands-down the BEST decision we could have made for him!
When we moved to Ohio at the end of his freshman year, we decided to go ahead and enroll him in the local public school on a trial basis. He graduated from there in May. Again, I still say that for him public school ended up being the best decision.
A couple of thoughts before answer #3…
Over the past few years, I’ve learned some things about our local school district and our local homeschool community that have further solidified my thoughts about Emma and public school.
- Our public school district has lost so much funding that they keep cutting teachers and classes at all levels. Who knows what that will look like when Emma’s in high school.
- We have alternative education options here. There are quite a few co-ops and university model schools here that we didn’t have access to in Texas. Even if they were available, however, we were not in a place where we could afford to send the kids there. Today, we are.
- We have access to dual enrollment classes at the local community college. She can take classes that will give her high school and college credit at the same time.
- Our school district allows homeschoolers to take up to two classes on the public school campus. I haven’t researched this option, but had a discussion with another homeschool mom last week about this very thing. I’m not sure this is the solution I’m looking for, but it is definitely worth checking out.
Answer #3 – Not now (maybe not ever)
Public school is not in my plans for Emma. I know she’s getting a great education here at home. She’s also attending a co-op where can participate in some electives – namely pottery and creative writing. She’s on a waiting list for another co-op where she can take some of her core classes – namely science.
With the option to tailor her education to meet her academic and health needs, I don’t see a reason to send her to public school full time. We are content with homeschooling, co-op classes, and maybe even dual enrollment classes eventually.
I don’t know what the future holds for Em. But, I don’t see full-time public school in her future. Right now, what we’re doing is working well for us. For the future, the co-op that Emma currently attends has a spring formal/prom for their high schoolers. They also have a formal graduation ceremony with caps/gowns and certificates of graduation. With these opportunities, she won’t feel so much like she’s “missing out” of the fun stuff high schoolers get to do.
How do you handle it when your kids express an interest in attending public school?
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I’m so glad you posted about this!!! This topic scares me & does come up here & there with my oldest, mainly because she started out in public school & now we’ve pulled her out and are in our 3rd year of homeschooling. I understand her missing her friends & wanting to be around them more, I just wish I could explain that its the only thing she misses. Its a struggle. She is taking 3-4 classes at a co-op which is great, and she loves it. It also allows us to put her different weekly summer camps during summer, which gives her that week of structure here and there. Anyways, thanks for sharing.
Don’t be scared. Do what’s best for each kid. And, if you decide to let her try public school again, it doesn’t have to be forever.
For our family, we don’t even entertain public school. It is Not Now, Not Ever, and that has worked for all my kids. I am glad you have found what works for your family.
Do you still live in Ohio?
We faced this same decision 2 years ago when homeschooling wasn’t working for my kids (3 school aged boys plus a toddler who needed his mom). We took a leap of faith and enrolled them in school and it has been the great blessing ever.
I’m glad you wrote that there is no one-size-fits-all answer – I completely agree! Before my kids entered public school, I thought it was something “good” Christian homeschool moms just didn’t do. I wrote about our decision on my blog and you wouldn’t believe the controversy I stirred up! But God has a plan for each of my kids and surprisingly it ended up being through our public school system. We are blessed to have a well-funded school district with caring teachers.
Thanks for sharing your story!
After our first two years of homeschooling, my oldest asked to go back to school for 11th and 12th grade, so I let him and in fact I sent the rest of the kids back for about two years because I was so burned out because I was trying too hard to recreate school at home. After we pulled them out the second and final time, I vowed to never let my kids set foot in school again. There is a high level of student violence in our schools, so the kids know it’s out of the question , but they’re okay with it because they really love homeschooling. To be honest, even if we would ever move, I still wouldn’t send them.
I am not a homeschooler (yet) nor was I homeschooled, but I love that you handle each child’s request based on their needs opposed to just saying no or yes. I also think it makes a huge difference if you have options (alternative school, co-ops, etc.) near you. Where I am from we don’t have anything and as you stated above, our school district is in the same state of having classes and teachers constantly cut. It makes me so nervous to have to think about those decisions looming in the near future. Thank you so much for sharing!
Cheers,
Lisa ~ http://www.dreamsandcaffeine.com
I found this post on the Grace and Truth link up. I pulled my two girls from public school and will begin homeschooling in the Fall. Right now we are thinking until high school. But I loved reading how different things worked for your different kids. Very encouraging!
I homeschooled my girls for the first time last year, grade 4 and grade 7, after them being in public school up to that point. Neither one is happy about it and my older one, now going into 8th grade, is SO unhappy about homeschooling. I am not a “homeschooling is for everyone all the time” person BUT after tons of prayer and wise counsel, I do NOT feel right about putting them back in school. It is a constant struggle! i am SO SO weary of this. So many times I am ready to throw in the towel and say fine you can go back to school but that is not where I feel God is leading me. I don’t know what to do! Many times I feel I just cannot take much more of their unhappiness but it would be going against everything in me to put them back in school. My husband is totally on board with me.
Awww, Tara, you just tugged at my mama heart! I’ve been homeschooling two after kinder. Thanks for sharing this!
Found you from #MomtoMomMondays.
I’m visiting from Mom-To-Mom linky and I enjoyed your honest post. We homeschool as well (oldest is 10) and I often wonder what the options are for high school in the future.
Such an interesting read. I need to start thinking about what to do with my kids now as they’ll be starting school in around 2 years time. I’ve not yet considered homeschooling and I certainly hadn’t thought about one going to school and the other being home schooled. Interesting #FridayFrivolity
My son (now 13) wanted to go to “real school”. As soon as I explained he would have to finish his work in 45 minutes, and what work was left over he would have to do at home, his eyes were bulging out. Then I added that he only had 5 minutes to get to his locker to exchange books and get to his next class, he looked exhausted. Needless to say he is still homeschooled!
Too funny!